Welcome to this week’s roundup of lifestyle and fashion, bought to you from the Balearics.

We’re slap bang in the middle of another roasting summer, and for most of July and August we’re coming to you from a combination of the Love Island and the White Isle.

We reside not too far from Magaluf in Mallorca and San Antonio in Ibiza, and have witnessed our fair share of holidaymakers passed out on benches at 9am in 30-degree heat, or (even worse) lifeless on beaches, looking like they’ll never wake up again. For some, hangovers are an integral part of summer and only pizza can drag them out of the “morning after the night before”.

(Vaguely) on the same theme, have you ever been in a situation where you want two slices of pizza but only have the capacity to hold one? Well, the folks over at Stupidiotic have got you covered.

The Portable Pizza Pouch is a triangular ziplock bag on a string that stores an extra slice of pizza to wear around your neck. It keeps the pizza warm and fresh.

Genius. But if you take a look at this photo, it appears that the actual pouch might be too small to hold, say, a decent slice. The bag looks like it can house a smallish slice of Dominos. But what about deep dish, Sicilian squares, etc? They really should make a different pizza pouch for each style of pie, then sell the lot of them in a box set. Perfect for Xmas.

Hey presto! Introducing the pizza fanny pack which holds the perfect amount of pizza slices. As usual, Amazon and Etsy are to blame, but we all know that in the height of summer, anything goes.

This week, we check out the voluptuous Demi Rose modelling big butts, hips and thongs, The Ikea Bucket Hat and The Must Have Headbands for all you fashionistas out there.

Enjoy!

The bucket hat has long been a wardrobe staple of seemingly every rapper, 90s raver or Liam Gallagher wannabe.

Those in the know will be aware of its return to fashion in 2019 – mostly in Gucci or “retro” incarnations.

The humble head-topper could be the sleeper hit of this summer and if you can’t get your hands on a retro version, then turn to IKEA.

Yes, IKEA has nudged its way into the fashion scene thanks to its collaboration with designer Virgil Abloh. 

In fairness to the Swedish brand, it’s been quietly crypto-cool ever since its inception in 1942, but Abloh’s seal of approval has officially elevated IKEA into the “hype” stratosphere.

The Ikea Bucket Hat is made from its signature blue bags. The hat quickly sold out online, leading to a surge in pricing – it’s now around £12.99 on various websites. I would advise you to click “purchase” right now, before prices skyrocket even further and the IKEA-bucket-hat bubble bursts.

If you remember last summer, it was all about the Ikea blue carrier bags being the “must-have” summer accessory. This year it’s the Ikea Bucket Hat. Who knows what’s coming next year – blue bag jeans and yellow belt?

IT’S THE BODY TREND THAT ISNT GOING ANYWHERE SOON.

Model Demi Rose showed off her incredible curves on the catwalk in thong swimwear last month, proving that thongs are the best way to show off the Kardashian shape more that more women are striving for in 2019.

The Instagram model was the envy of the stage with her dramatic gold costume. She revealed her peachy bum in a thong swimsuit.

The shiny gold number had strategically placed cut-outs that showed off her flat tum and tiny waist.

In another shot, she poured her voluptuous curves into a cream bikini with high waisted pants.

For her third outfit change she wore a sleeved crop top that flattered her famous bust.

Gorgeous Demi was announced as the face of Oh Polly’s metallic swimwearcollection last month, much to the excitement of her 9.2 million Instagram followers.

This body shape, started by Kim and Kylie, is not the healthiest, it has to be said. In most cases fat is sucked out of the tummy and transferred into the bum cheeks. But it’s everywhere now, from Love Island to The Only Way is Essex.

One person who will certainly be appreciating these curves is Demi’s boyfriend, DJ Chris Martinez. The pair have been dating since December 2017, when they were spotted kissing at an airport in Madrid and they have been going strong ever since.

Superstar DJ Chris, who performs alongside brother Stevie as The Martinez Brothers,regularly tours the globe to sell-out crowds. He and Demi were on holiday in Ibiza a few weeks ago where they looked ‘loved up’ as they strolled hand in hand around the Balearic island.

Statement headbands are now trending, as seen on A-list Celebs, and even royalty.

There is no ignoring that headbands are this summer’s biggest hair accessory trend. Kate Middleton, Alexa Chung and Rita Ora are all about jewelled or bow headbands.

The Duchess of Cornwall recently wore a Stella McCartney pink dress and bespoke Juliette Botterill headband to Archie’s christening, proving she is pushing the boundaries with her outfit choices and taking note of the latest trends. Especially matching red and pink.

Since Alexa Chung stepped out adding a bold red satin bow headband to her classic white shirt and jeans combo, the trend has further picked up momentum.

So, we’ve picked the most stylish headbands, that won’t break the bank, available to shop now…

1. Plait & knot detailing

Pink Velvet Plait Headband, was £12, now£7.20, I Saw It First

Velvet headbands look super chic and expensive 

Susanna Twisted Headband, £28.00, Anthropologie

2. Bejewelled beauty

V by Very Jewel Embellished Headband, £25, Very.co.uk

Inspired by Rita Ora opt for a blingtastic headband 

Beaded Knot Headband, £25.00, Topshop

3. Take a bow

Animal Colourblock Red Headband, £18, Oliver Bonas

ASOS DESIGN fascinator headband with statement bow in dusky pink, £10.00, Asos.com

That’s it. Schools out for the summer, cases are packed and I’m Balearic bound for a long hot season in the sun.

For me, this means two months of swimming, sunbathing socialising, squid and sangria.

As for my teenage daughter and the whole ‘Love Island’ generation, it means lashes, nails and rainbow hair.

The latest nail trend: Ombre Nails

Gone are the days when we packed factor 50, armbands, sweet sun dresses and sandals. Instead she insists on enormous Spice Girls Buffalo trainers, Ombre nails, purple hair and Apple air pods.

Still, we mutually love our beloved Balearic Islands and whether you’re high maintenance or not, we’re all looking forward to spending some quality family time together.

I’m hoping it will be a healthy few weeks, although the lure of Clockwork Orange in Ibiza next weekend is very tempting. I’m trying my best to keep it strictly fresh Orange Juice from the local Mercadona instead.

This week we discover Hi-Tech fashion, Balearic Bikinis to make you smile, the painfully sounding Scrotox procedure and the full bush is back. Yes, really. Enjoy.

Clothing has been developed that could change colour and warn the wearer if they are becoming unwell.

Researchers are working on smart clotheswith conductive fibres in the fabric . This hi-tech fashion will be with us within 10 years. Garments will be woven with “responsive material”, which can alert the wearer if they are getting ill by analysing their sweat.

“Mood-changing” garments will build the technology found in smart wristbands, created by University of Lancaster scientists. They change colour and heat up in response to changes in electrical conductivity of the wearer’s skin. This could help manage diseases such as diabetes, by sensing if the wearer has high glucose levels.

Scientists are also integrating graphene into thread so it becomes a rechargeable power supply. Research shows how graphene inks can be used in textiles to store electrical charges and “release it when required”. Hey presto, automatic phone charging in one’s pockets becomes a possibility. 

Will consumers be swayed by the technological and environmental advantages of owning a garment that has multiple uses and lasts for a long time, rather than “fast fashion” which gets discarded after a few months?

But practical challenges remain, including ensuring that smart garments can withstand multiple washes. Up to this point, we’ve become so preoccupied with making fabric cheaply, we haven’t really done anything innovative with it.

So, by 2030 clothes will be more adaptable, boosting the value we get from them. Ultimately, they’ll be part of our ever-increasing arsenal of tech .

Here are two of the latest bikini trends witnessed on Balearic beaches this summer, both by Brazilian designer Adriana Degreas.

The first trend makes your bikini bottoms look like a pair of lips. The sexy swimwear resembles a plump pout. The Adriana Degreas lips bikini would make you stand-out above all others on any beach.

POUT AND ABOUT

This bikini draws inspiration from our most sensual body part.

The £390 Bacio Structured Strapless Bikini with Knot, features a cheeky smile at the crotch. A slit runs along the bikini line, creating the illusion of an open mouth.

The product description reads: “This playful red lip bikini is made of stretch fabric structured strapless top – it´s designed for those who prefer statement pieces at the beach.

(Pic: INSTAGRAM/ADRIANA DEGREAS)

The Brazilian fashion designer also created a similar two-piece – but this time, the lips motif is visible on the top.

Adriana’s Charlotte Olympia Pin-Up Kiss Bikiniretails for £210and comes in a romantic red shade.

The top is made from mesh, making it rather see-through. Thankfully, the wearer’s intimate areas are covered by opaque material that forms into a pout.

The product description explains: “This Pin Up Kiss bikini is made from stretch fabric and tulle that’s detailed with strategically placed lips. “Adjust the ties to personalise the fit.”

The second trend is this “sexy hands” bikini which makes it look like you’re sunbathing topless. IS this the sexiest swimwear trend of 2019?  This bikini would certainly make onlookers do a double-take.

Adriana Degreas is selling the Hands Stapless Bikinifor around £260.

The Brazilian designer cleverly created an illusion by mixing clear fabric with hand-crafted hands. Wear it while sunbathing, with a pair of big vintage sunglasses for your next summer escape.

I love them both because, let’s face it, how many more summers can we keep wheeling out the boho crochet number. These are fun and so very 2019.

BLOKES are forking out £550 for Botox injections on their balls. The procedure is said to help smooth the testicles and iron out unsightly wrinkles.

Image-conscious men are going to new lengths to make their intimate areas look great.  If penis enlargement surgery and pearling wasn’t dedication enough, chaps are now getting their balls Botoxed. And I thought we women were vain.

The ‘Scrotox’ procedure costs £550 and is said to be highly painful. A medical director at Australia’s CALIBRE Clinic, says there’s been a surge SCROTOX procedures. Next stop? Bossa Beach? Santa Ponsa Beach? Brighton Beach?

While some opt for the treatment for medical reasons, others do it to make their testicles look more appealing to their partners. The most common medical reason is because their scrotum is tightly contracted, squeezing up on their testicles, with painful results. The relaxation of the scrotum helps the testes to hang a bit lower and offers some relief.  

Patients claim the op makes their balls look smoother and less wrinkly. Some also say it can reduce redness and sagging.

As with any surgery, Scrotox does have its risks. To carry out the procedure, surgeons inject muscle-relaxing Botox into the testicles. The scrotum is a very vascular organ, and there is a potential risk for the Botox to travel throughout the body if injected incorrectly.

If you are self-conscious about your intimate areas, suffice to say it’s advisable to seek the advice of your GP.

Girls, put down the razors! The ‘full bush’ is back in fashion.

Yes, there’s no need to worry about hair removal anymore. According to commentators, the full bush is the pubic hair style many women are opting for right now.

The WAX AXE is great news, because maintaining a smooth bikini-line is no mean feat. From shaving rash and in-grown hairs, to finding the time, to agonising waxing, going bare definitely has its drawbacks.

A New York-based expert in this ‘field’ attributed this trend to women choosing function over fashion. “Women are becoming increasingly aware that our bodies are a lot more than the visual or sexual playthings.

The feminist approach to hair removal is nothing new. Celebrities including Gwyneth Paltrow and Emma Watson have spoken out about leaving their pubic region au-natural.

The Harry Potter star said she uses oil to keep her fuzz nourished and soft. “I use fur oil. It’s an amazing all-purpose product.”

You might to want to read the Balearic Bikini article in this week’s instalment before deciding on this. Ibiza beach-goers don’t seem to have necessarily got the message.

Welcome to July.

Welcome to the Heat.

Last weekend, I rounded off all my “all of June” birthday celebrations with a quiet weekend in Mallorca. It was meant to be a relaxing Fri-Sun Balearic break. But by Saturday afternoon I was on a plane back to London.

Why? Because it was too bloody boiling and I couldn’t sleep a wink in the killer 40-degree heat.

Even under a powerful air-con unit, I couldn’t cool down and tossed, turned (and sweated) all night long.

I couldn’t even enjoy driving around in the glorious sunshine with the roof down. I should probably be used to Spanish summers by now, but this weekend wasn’t a typical summer weekend anywherein Europe. It was one of the most uncomfortable heatwaves on record, with temps in the 40s everywhere. 

So how do we sleep in a heatwave?

So, I flew home early, only to get off the plane at 8pm to 35 degrees in “tropical” Luton.

Choose Egyptian cotton bed sheets. Save the ooh-la-la satin, silk, or polyester sheets for autumnal nights. Feel the freezer burn. Stick sheets in the fridge or freezer for a few minutes before bed.

Get cold comfort loose PJs and create a cross-breeze with open windows and (quiet) fans. A cooling water spray for the back of the neck stops the old sweats.

Do I sound like an old lady yet? I hope not. Anyway – here’s to full-on summertime.

This issue is all about Festival fashion as we check out the trends at Glastonbury. I felt terrible just watching Kylie sweat in that red jumpsuit…. Here I go again. Gardens and pools will be filled with poo this year plus the interesting combination of Nike Trainers and kitten heels.